I’ve heard the argument many times through the years. “Cool” Christian parents love to use it. They have no problem with their kids watching television shows and movies or playing video games that are filled with profanity and vulgarity of all kinds, for this simple reason: It’s no worse than what they’re hearing at school.
Now, I have a daughter in the ninth grade, so I know for a fact that these parents are 100% correct. In the hallways of school, the f-word is bandied about constantly. Sexual jokes are common, and inappropriate talk is a way of life. It’s difficult to be a Christian kid in a public school, but it can be done, and what a mission field it is. I have complete faith that the Lord is using school as a training ground for my girl, helping her learn to love those who are sometimes difficult to love. Helping her understand how great the need is in our world for the only good one, Jesus Christ.
I know that she hears these things at school. However, you will not see me inviting foul-mouthed kids into my living room and sitting my children on the couch so that they can listen to an unlimited supply of the f-word. Doing that would be weird and spiritually confusing. Regardless of what the cool parents claim, there should be a huge difference in what my children see and hear outside of our home and what they see and hear inside of it. Christian homes should be filled with what is pure, right, noble, and lovely. These are the things that we should be encouraging our children to think on. Personal holiness in our children begins with what we approve of inside the walls of our own houses. Allowing our kids to consume profanity-ridden entertainment in our living rooms is tantamount to putting our stamp of approval on the very language that they are putting up with all day at school. I want my kids’ ears to be tuned to God’s word, not the world’s words, and if our home is a haven of godly teaching and wholesome entertainment, then every time they hear an f-bomb dropped at school, it be a sour note that helps show them the difference between living for Christ and living for everything else.
I know. It’s only language. Words. But, don’t fool yourself, cool Christian parents. It matters what your kids hear inside your home. How can we expect our kids to love the Lord with all their heart, soul, and mind if we say we are for holiness, but our actions show them that entertainment is more important? What a sad substitute for an all-in faith.
Yes! Thank you for putting this so well!
Thank you, Katie!
As usual, you are right on! Keep up the fight!
Thanks, Linda!
Yes and Amen! We are definitely in the minority though and it can be a tough row to hoe. We have values and we stand on them without judgement of what others are doing. Fortnight was the most recent line drawn in our home. I think the best thing we can do in these situations is to talk with our kids and help them to navigate the decisions so they come to their own conclusion that these things are inappropriate. I think it’s important for them to understand the why behind our decisions and not just a because I said so or because this is what we believe stance. With Fortnight we showed our kids the game trailer and asked them if it were real life what part of that game would be ok? Would it be ok for them to kill people for sport? They came to their own conclusions and when asked by friends they are better equipped to answer with more than a “my mom said no” response. And when my kids are older I hope this helps equip them to make sound decisions. However, we do tell our kids all the time that we are ok being the bad guy and they can blame us anytime. Being a kid is hard these days. But as for me and my house…
Agree! Thank you, Candice!
I agree with everything you’ve said here. I wonder if some parents might be helped by some additional guidance on what to do when a friend of their child uses foul language when in your home. While our children’s (I’m saying this in hindsight as mine are now grown) closest friends will hopefully use more gracious speech, there may be occasion to bring home an unbeliever as a means to show grace to them. What guidance might you offer for those situations?
Hi, Suzanne! My advice would be to kindly tell the child that we don’t use that kind of language in our home. I think kids are used to conforming to the rules in different situations. I don’t think adults should ever be afraid to tell a child or teenager what is acceptable and what isn’t. Kids expect and need rules. Thanks so much for your comment!