We live in a world of outrage. Social media gurus teach us that we should get worked up about every injustice that comes our way, and that we deserve better. Armchair therapists sit behind a microphone and fill their podcasts with stories about how happiness comes from looking out for yourself above all, from grasping for all that you can get in this life, from cutting people out who don’t appreciate you like they should. It seems like everywhere we look, we’re encouraged to draw a line, set a boundary, confront someone, rubs someone’s nose in their own wrongdoing.
But as Christians, we have to recognize that this messaging, even if it’s branded as Christian, is almost always overblown and self-centered. I’m not saying that no one ever needs to set boundaries. But I am saying that as people who have received God’s grace, we should be the first ones offering grace to others. Is it really necessary to hold a grudge against every person who ever said an unfair word about us? I fail to see how that leads to a happier life. In fact, this seems like a sure way to live unhappily obssessed with the actions of other people.
Instead of making it our life goal to hold everyone around us accountable, what if Christians decided that a major focus of our lives would be the amazing grace of God? What if every time we are tempted to think about how someone has done us wrong, we thought instead about all of the ways that God has forgiven us, all of the things that He loves us in spite of, all of the ways that His heart of compassion goes out to us when we are struggling sinners? What if we made it our habit to redirect every graceless thought we have about someone else, thinking instead about the endless, beautiful grace that God has lavished on us? When we think about our great need for His grace, it makes it easier to extend grace to other people, even when they don’t deserve it.
Several years ago I ran across a few little verses while reading the book of Ecclesiastes. The teacher is writing about wisdom. It spoke to me so much that I wrote it out and posted it inside my bathroom cabinet, where I read it while I’m getting ready for the day. It says, “Indeed, there is no one on the earth who is righteous, no one who does what is right and never sins. Don’t pay attention to everything people say, or you may hear your servant cursing you, for in your heart you know many times you have cursed others” (7:20-22). Thinking about how often I myself have done people wrong, how often I have spoken out of turn, had a bad attitude, let life circumstances dictate how I treat someone, it makes it almost impossible to hold a grudge against others.
Notice that I said it’s almost impossible. I still manage to do it at times, but I want to be gracious when I am wronged, because I know how very gracious God is. He has doled out grace to me over and over and over again. I may be sinned against from time to time, but I have sinned against others far more. I have been a recipient of grace from friends and strangers, and I have lived miraculously in the grace of God. The last thing I want to do is lose focus on God’s grace so that I can wallow in self-pity or wither as a bitter, angry person. Jesus came to give me an abundant life. I am living in an abundance of grace. The healthiest, most fulfilling thing I can do as a follower of Christ is offer grace to the world around me. Through the power of the Holy Spirit, I can. Those who get grace can give it. I want to give it freely, for then I know that I am becoming more like Jesus.
