This morning I didn’t get out of bed when my alarm went off. I didn’t get up and read my Bible and pray. I didn’t roll out of bed until the very last second.
I didn’t wake my kids with a song or with tickling or with a corny joke. I didn’t smile my way through the lunch-making. I didn’t have their clothes neatly laid out so that getting them ready for school would be easier. I didn’t help them search for shoes. I didn’t put their sandwiches in ziploc bags because we’ve been out for a few days. I didn’t put sweet notes in their lunch boxes.
I didn’t kiss them goodbye like always because there was a search for a missing backpack.
I didn’t send them off and start getting lots of things accomplished. I didn’t make the grocery list that I should have. I didn’t want to think about budgets.
I didn’t make up my bed.
I didn’t read books to Emerald. I didn’t send any encouraging messages. I didn’t cook any meals. I didn’t work out. I didn’t write a brilliant blog post.
I didn’t impress anyone.
I didn’t lose a child in a crowd or burn down the house or smell bad. I didn’t discover the answers to life’s biggest questions. I didn’t have an original thought.
I didn’t feel like I had it together today. I didn’t feel like I was succeeding.
I didn’t wipe the hot tears away when I confessed my failures to my husband.
I didn’t try to hide my smile when he joked to make me laugh.
I didn’t mind when Emerald woke up from her nap. I didn’t interrupt when the kids told ten stories apiece about school. I didn’t skimp on our bedtime reading.
I didn’t forget to kiss them goodnight.
I didn’t live out the greatest day of my kids’ childhood.
I didn’t ask for help. I didn’t reach out to the One who can do all things when I feel like I can’t do anything.
Yet, by His grace, I didn’t leave this earth today.
Tomorrow is another chance. In His hands, I can do all the things I didn’t do.
this post, Melissa, is the anti-post. no perfect-momma-accomplishment-checklist, no “hey, look how awesome i was today” recounting. i know i don’t need to tell you, but today you broke the mommy blogger mold. thank you. i needed to read it as my day begins…after already dusting cocoa powder all over the kitchen, forgetting i had turned on the espresso maker as i put a load in the washer (wasted coffee AND a mess), and remembering the grass was wet after i let the dogs back in…time to mop. we aren’t in a race toward parental perfection….just a daily effort to abide. thank you.
🙂 Thank you, malindar! I love what you say here. No race toward perfection. Let’s both remember that as we start our day! Blessings!