An Open Letter to Miley Cyrus

Dear Miley,

You are a beautiful, intelligent, and talented girl.  You have been gifted with a remarkable life.  Yet, you have bought a lie.

I’m not sure who is feeding you this lie, or who fed this lie to Britney or who feeds it to the girl down the street or the hard working mother or to the middle-aged divorcee.  This lie tells you that your sexuality is the only thing about you that matters.  It says that your worth comes from the way you use your body.  It hisses that all that anyone wants from you is sex.

And you swallow this lie.  You chew it slowly and let its dangerous and destructive poison slide down your throat and you begin to imagine that you enjoy the way this feels.  This giving up of yourself.

You take this part of you that you seem to find so important, and you carelessly throw it at anyone who passes by.  At everyone who sees you.  You pretend that this is necessary.  That this is part of growing up.

You get attention.  You smile and seem to be having fun with it.

But, your heart is breaking.  And your crash is coming.  And the deep-down truth of your little girl soul is that even while you lie naked on the cover of Rolling Stone, big as day, you feel smaller and smaller with each passing hour.

And you hate what you are pretending to be.

So, I say this to you and to all the other girls who have bought the lie:  it’s never too late to reclaim womanhood for intelligence and competence.  Sex is such a small part of who you really are, girls.  And it has nothing whatsoever to do with your worth.

As a mother of two young daughters, I plan to remind them of this over and over and over.  May the truths I whisper overpower the lies that will come from Rolling Stone covers and music videos.

Miley, don’t go on lying to our girls.  Show them that true womanhood is about dignity and grace.  You have so much more to offer the world.

Sincerely,

Melissa, who Hates the Lie