Imagine that this life is one huge trial. Your husband is the accused. He’s facing the judge and jury for being insensitive, being rude, not listening, not caring, not being a good leader in your home, not communicating, not being a man of God, not being smart, and not spending enough time with the children.
Now imagine that he is allowed to call only one witness on his behalf. This witness is one person whom he knows he can trust. One person who will stick by him no matter what happens, who will never betray him or paint him in a false or negative light. He turns to you and asks for your witness. You, who promised to love him through better or worse. You are prepared to stand up and tell everyone all of the good you see in your mate when the judge informs you that your testimony has already arrived. He pulls out a recording of everything you’ve said about your husband in the past several years.
Would your husband be glad he chose you as his one witness? Or would what you have said to friends and family members condemn him beyond all help?
Many spouses are horrible witnesses for each other. Often we don’t realize how casual complaints here and there are ruining our loved one’s reputation. It’s true we may vent and then feel better and move on, stop feeling that way and forget what we even said. But, the person we spoke the condemning word to will always remember the negative impression they had of our mate in that moment.
As married couples, we should be able to count on each other to lift up our relationship and our good points when speaking to other people. After all, if our husbands can’t count on us to promote them as great guys whom we love, then who can they count on? Their mothers?
We are their first, best, and most respected witnesses. What we say about our husbands matters! Let’s not be guilty of condemning them with our petty complaints and jokes. They have given their lives to us. That alone is worth praising.
Even if no one else in the world has a good thing to say about our husbands, they should be able to count on us. Let’s resist the urge to join the throng of men-bashers. Our husbands, imperfect as they may be, deserve better.