Three years old is a wilderness.
I’m back in the desert. I’m wandering, like Moses, with a little stiff-necked person in tow, and I’m crying out to God. “Lord, what would you have me to do with this one? For soon she will stone me.”
Ok, I’m being a little dramatic. I find myself once again in the realm of the toddler, after so many years in the Promised Land of kids who can bathe themselves and put on their own pants. And I have to say that doing this again as an “older” mother has changed my perspective in many ways.
As a young mother, I was what I would consider large-and-in-charge. I felt a lot of determination in certain areas that related to my kids’ behavior, and I did what it took to make them toe the line. I expended a lot of energy on this, and things went well for me. My kids were what I would call naturally docile and mostly calm. Of course, they had their moments, but they were not the kinds of kids that I would sometimes see in the grocery store–those kids that I thought just needed a good dose of large-and-in-charge.
But as an older mother I find that my prioroties have shifted a bit. I’m less concerned with whether she is running in the hallway. She is a moving, sprinting, jumping, diving, spinning, singing as loud as possible wild one, and I find that I don’t want to large-and-in-charge this particular spiritedness out of her. It is teaching me about how different types of kids need different things from their parents. God gives some of us the spirited ones. The wild ones. And for all of you who had the wild ones when my other kids were little, I didn’t understand back then. I get it now.
With wild ones, you have to learn to dial them back without shutting them down. You have to learn to guide them spiritually in ways that speak to their desire to move and have ten things going at once. You have to remember that their hearts are no less receptive just because they like to wiggle and be a little too loud. With wild ones, you have to dig deep for the kind of patience that is a gift of God, the kind that is a fruit of His spirit living inside of us. The wild ones help us rely on our Savior and remember how much grace we ourselves need. The wild ones help us dole out mercy and see the fun and electric energy of being with them. They may make us tired. But those wild ones are bursting with spiritual potential and often have a special way of connecting with people that God can use all day long.

To those of you who are raising a wild one or two right now, don’t be afraid to let their spirits be a little freer than you’re comfortable with. Don’t be afraid to ease up on that large-and-in-charge attitude that is more about rules and less about the heart.
To those of you who have never raised a wild one, I’m here to tell you that some children are more difficult to handle than others. You may look at a kid in the grocery store sometime and think you could do better, but unless you’ve been wandering in the wilderness with a wild one yourself, you just don’t know, do you? So extend grace to all the children and all their parents. Show love and care and not scorn. Some of your favorite preachers and missionaries and Sunday school teachers were once wild ones themselves.
I simply can’t wait to see what God does with our littlest. Her spirit isn’t easily dampened! And I sure don’t want to be the one pouring cold water on God’s purposes for her. Don’t panic, parents of the wild ones. God knows what He’s doing!
“With wild ones, you have to learn to dial them back without shutting them down. You have to learn to guide them spiritually in ways that speak to their desire to move and have ten things going at once. ”
Follow-up article please lol
I’ll work on that, Chris! Thanks for reading!